What IS Socialization & Why It Matters.

Madelyn VanStaveren
Jul 21
7 min read

Updated: Jul 26

Hello, Wonderful Humans! If you've ever brought a new puppy home, you've heard this over and over again, socialize, socialize, socialize. You may also hear phrases like "critical learning period" or "fear period". But what is socialization, really? Does exposing your pup to all sorts of other dogs and people work? And why does your dog still bark at people and pets even though you did all the "right" things? You have questions, I have answers :) Let's chat. In this article, we will cover: 1) What Socialization is.

2) Why Socialization matters.

3) How to Socialize your new puppy.

What Is Socialization?

I've found that the most helpful explanation & perspective of this to be from the Book How to Raise A Puppy: A Dog-Centric Approach by Stephanie Rousseau and Truid Rugaas. There are actually two concepts that we combine when referring to Socialization in Dog Training:

Habituation-> "the process by which animals learn about the world they live in and what they need to pay attention to and what they can ignore."
Socialization -> "the process whereby an animal learns how to recognize and interact with its group members."

When does Socialization start and end?

Socialization is a lifelong learning process for our dogs; however, there are a few "critical" phases of development where you should make calm exposure & stability a priority. During these phases, your pup is most vulnerable & sensitive to frightening situations. There is also a developmental phase we consider the "critical socialization period".

Important Development Milestones to remember:

8-10 weeks --> 1st Fear period
12-16 weeks --> Critical Socialization Period
6- 14 months --> 2nd fear period
Early Adult Hood --> Possible 3rd Fear Period

Why Socialization Matters:

During Socialization, your dog is learning about who and what is safe, neutral or scary in their world-- people, dogs, sounds, surfaces, objects-- everything is new to them, and their experiences during this time will shape the rest of their lives. So here's the truth:

Calm, happy, confident dogs live calm, happy, confident lives -- with you.

Dogs who become fearful, overwhelmed, anxious, scared, and unsure end up being limited by those feelings--and so does the dream you had for your life with them. And that's heartbreaking. There are some experiences that no amount of training can undo. I know that's a scary thought. I like to explain it as similar to trauma responses in humans, we can go to therapy, learn coping skills, new ways to handle our triggers, maybe even lessen the level of reaction to a trigger over time. But..... It stays with us. So teaching your pup how to safely and confidently experience the world we've placed them in might be the most important skill we can help them learn. It could be the difference between:

Farmers markets, coffee strolls, beach days & waterfall hikes OR
Living with the constant feelings of guilt, worry, and frustration because the barking and pulling were too much—and you had to leave them behind.

I work with so many families on the second path, and I promise it's not because they don't LOVE their dog or care or try. In fact, most of the time they OVER do it and unintentionally force their dogs into situations they are not ready for. It's often because no one told them how to PROPERLY socialize their pups. They were thrown into the deep end with nothing but a hope, a dream, and Google as their guiding light.

Sidebar moment. Genetics play a role in your dog's baseline behavior & sensitivities! Which is WHY it's so important to properly socialize. A hypervigilant breed who learns that they can disengage from the environment will act VERY differently as an adult than one who accidentally learns that they need to respond to every single stimulus that appears. It's a LOT, I know, even in writing this I have anxiety about it. So if you are feeling overwhelmed, you are NOT alone. Let's break down how to socialize your puppy so you feel prepared and empowered to handle socialization like a PRO.

How to Socialize Your Puppy

Dun, dun, dun, dunnnnnnn-- the moment you've been waiting for!!!!

*The following recommendations involve exploring the world with your puppy before they are fully vaccinated. Please consult with your veterinarian to determine when it’s safe for your puppy to be in unsterile environments. Until then, use tools like a puppy stroller, sanitized cart, or wagon to keep your pup physically safe while still gently exposing them to the sights, sounds, and rhythms of everyday life.

How do you socialize your new puppy?

And how to tell if our puppies are having a cool, calm experience, or if things are getting too overwhelming.

How to Tell Your Puppy Is Having a Positive Experience

Soft body language - relaxed muscles, loose tail wags, eyes are soft (no wide "whale eyes" ), ears are not pinned back, mouth open with a regular pant. Paw is not tucked under their body. You may notice a paw lift when approaching items or people. This is a "not so comfy" sign; don't add pressure on either end.
Curious sniffing- exploring the environment with their nose, not frantically scanning or freezing up.
Movement- it's normal for some excitement and jumping to happen at first, but it should not remain at that level for long. When approaching objects, they should be able to explore at their own pace.
Taking treats/ eating--> if your pup is comfortable, they'll take food easily. If they cannot take food or take it then spit it out, this is one sign they are overwhelmed. Pause, give them a break and calmly guide them out of the situation or have the object or person removed.
Recovery time--> How long does it take for your pup to investigate or recover after a new item or sound is presented in the environment? Being startled is OK! But your puppy shouldn't avoid the object after.

Ways To Socialize Your Puppy

Yes, enrolling in a puppy socialization class can be a great start, but not all puppy classes are created equal.

In fact? It’s better to skip a class entirely than to attend one that’s poorly run.

When choosing a class, here’s what to look for:

The main objective should be emotional regulation, appropriate interactions, and confidence building, NOT obedience.
Puppies should be allowed to observe or interact, not forced into play
The environment should be calm, not chaotic and should be a small group
And of course, no pain, dominance, or force-based methods—ever

A good puppy class helps your pup build confidence, learn consent-based interaction, and understand that the world isn’t something to fear.

No Class? No Problem. Let’s Talk DIY Socialization.

You don’t have to take a class to raise a well-adjusted pup. If you’re doing it yourself, just keep a few core principles in mind:

1. Let Your Pup Engage at Their Own Pace

Don’t force interactions. Curiosity should lead the way—not pressure. Taking your pup to an amusement park with TONS of new sounds, smells, and sights is probably not the best idea.

2. Keep Greetings Calm

When meeting new people, avoid the whole “OOOOO what a cute puppy!!" scritch scritch scruff scruff with both hands bent over top of the puppy energy. Calm energy helps puppies stay regulated. Gentle pets and play with one hand will help stop nipping & overstimulation.

3. Go Slow With Handling & Grooming

Desensitizing your pup to baths, handling, and grooming is a must! Start with gentle touches, one paw at a time. Then show the nail grinder or clippers calmly. There’s no rush. Low and slow is best.

4. A Few Real Friends Are Better Than a Bunch of Forced Ones

Playdates with well-adjusted adult dogs teach way more than a chaotic puppy pile. Socialization is about quality, not quantity.

5. Skip Leash Greetings

Dogs should not approach each other head-on on leash. It's a recipe for disaster. Use a long line so your pup can explore without pulling. If you see another dog approaching, calmly move away and encourage your pup to follow. Make sure to choose locations with a large amount of space—where your pup can see other dogs but doesn’t have to interact. Pro tip: Use a “Do Not Pet” leash attachment to set clear boundaries while training.

6. Stay Calm Yourself

Your puppy is learning from you every moment. Model the energy you want them to reflect.

7. Remember—It’s a Whole New World

Your goal is to gently and gradually introduce your pup to everything this big, wild world has to offer. Different textures, water, grass, cement, wood, gravel, dirt, people on bikes, skateboards, roller blades, kids on scooters -it's ALLL new. Keep it light, keep it safe, and always go at their pace.

Distance is your friend!

Creating a safe space where your pup can experience the world and observe from a distance is GREAT. You can always get closer as your pup gets more confident and leads you.

Start gently exposing your pup to things they will come across living with you

Ask yourself: Do you love hiking? Want to sip coffee on dog-friendly patios? Love traveling?

Then think:

Can your puppy ride along in a wagon on hikes before they're fully vaccinated?
Can they come with you to outdoor stores like Cabela’s to see animal displays and different floor textures?
Can you do daily short car rides to build a routine and comfort?
What kinds of SOUNDS will they be exposed to?
- Thunderstorms?
- Traffic noises?
- Garbage trucks?
- Barking Dogs or other animals?
- Espresso machines & Coffee Grinders? ( That's a big one in our house )
- The Vacuum?

Advocate, Advocate, Advocate for your dog

You do not have to let everyone pet your puppy. In fact—you shouldn’t.

The goal of outings isn’t to make your puppy best friends with the world. It’s to help them feel safe existing in the world.

If someone asks to pet, and it’s not the right moment, just say:

No Petting—we’re training today.
She’s learning to stay calm around new people.
Not today, but thank you for asking!
Please give us space, we are training

Of course, if the right person asks and your puppy is calm, happy, and clearly wants to say hello, go for it! Letting your pup choose, builds trust and confidence in you.

If you are still with me right now, then you are AMAZINNNNGGGGGG. Seriously, bravo, because I didn't even realize how long this was going to be.

Puppies bring incredible joy into our lives.

My goal—now and always—is to help people find that joy, and to empower them with the knowledge, confidence, and skills they need to thrive alongside their canine companions.

But maddie, this was a lot of info... is their a list? OF COURSE there is a list my friend.

When you sign up for my monthly newsletter, you’ll get instant access to my FREE Pawsitive Puppy Pathways Packet—a downloadable guide packed with real-life tools to help you get started.

Inside, you’ll find: